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Gay dating a less attractive guy in real life

I've sat across from hundreds of gay men in my therapy practice who came in thinking they just needed better dating tactics. Here's Why. 1 The real problem? No surprise, guys picked up on this instantly. 2 I see this pattern constantly with my clients. And it's definitely not that you're "too picky" I sigh every time someone suggests this. 3 Once I saw the pattern, I could finally break it. This isn't some fantasy land. 4 I guess that's why I still wonder about him. This isn't some fantasy land. 5 Others flourish in ethical non-monogamy. As soon as I sat down, something possessed me to proclaim, "Finally! 6 The problem isn't the structure—it's choosing one that conflicts with your authentic needs to please others or fit some community ideal. As soon as I sat down, something possessed me to proclaim, "Finally! 7 This revelation didn't magically fix everything, but it gave him the awareness to start questioning his attractions rather than blindly following them. I've seen this growth happen hundreds of times, but it rarely happens in isolation. 8 Most gay guys (from my personal experience) have this idea of the men they're attracted to. Most of their references are from the boys and men. I guess that's why I still wonder about him. 9 Real confidence (as opposed to arrogance) is fucking sexy. You will find a future boyfriend by being where other queer men are (don't overlook. But for many gay men, rejection isn't just rejection—it's confirmation of a deeply held fear that we are fundamentally unacceptable. 10 › askgaybros › comments › life_as_an_unattractive_gay. No surprise, guys picked up on this instantly. 12

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